my lazy day

something bothers me, through which i don't know the cause.
today,  i woke up feeling lazy. never wanting to stand up, take a bath, to dress up and even pick some food in the table.


just sitting in my bed, i watch my room mates move like birds only stopping when necessary.
i wonder, why am i so unconscious of the time, and why am i squandering it?
i too, cant answer this as of the moment. but, maybe because


 today i don't feel like doing anything (whistling, tootoo to tooo to.. )

remembering then

its not my family, pinay baya ko.
hehehehe

"All at once, I finally took a moment and I'm realizing that ,You're not coming back"


heavy, and feeling about to cry, every time i here this Whitney Houston song, not because i can remember someone who broke my heart , but, because i always hear this song when i was a still a kid.


i miss being a ten year old once again.
to play dolls with my girl friends, imitate our moms in their very red lipstick and wear their high heeled shoes three times bigger than our feet, molding clay with our bare hands in different colors.


i miss being a ten year old once again,
because life was so much simple then, no heart aches, no rejections and failures. 
and, much more, i'm with the presence of every one i value most in my life, my mom, my dad, my brother and my sister. The few people i miss so much now while sitting here and writing this blog.


as a kid, 
we wanna grow up so fast and do the things the old people do. we are so curios to explore the world and experience the truth in life. And now, that i'm here, i now can attest to my self that the old people were right. that we should cherish being young, for when we grow up, we wanna be young again.




"Ever since I met you ,You're the only love I've known ,And I can't forget you ,Though I must face it all alone "


all at once, i wanna be young again and experience the comfort of life with THEM, my so called family.


i miss all of you, so much.

a bad dream

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i felt the heat of the sun, prickling on my skin, wanting to stand up but i was unable to move, i lay there, immobile on my bed for more than thirty minutes, struggling, fighting the unknown battle. 

sweat moisten my skin, my breathing as fast as the motorcycles on the street, 

and then, BANG!

and slowly, from blurred images and sound..

slowly coming back to reality,

i'm finally back, to the world i was into.  

and freed from nightmare,i saw them, my roommates telling me i was DREAMING.

the long road to getting done

at last, i have one signature from the dean, too far from what i had been expecting.
well, i never really did anticipate the crowd.

cold sweat running down my forehead to my throat, such a sticky feeling paired with tired feet,
equals, I WANNA QUIT THIS THING idea in my head.